Itsy Bitsy Teeny Weeny

For those of you who don't personally know us, let me describe Pootiepie for you before I start this story. She is 13 and just starting to grow out of being a tomboy, at least on the outside. Inside she's pretty much the same. She's either 5'1" or 5'2" and barely weighs 80 pounds. She looks like a newborn colt, all legs. Her legs are so stick skinny they don't look like they should be able to hold her up. The only big thing on her are her feet. She currently wears a women size 8.5 shoe and counting. They look like flippers attached to the skinniest ankles you can imagine and her thighs aren't much bigger.

Swimsuit season is upon us and we, the adults of the family, decided it was time for her to get a new one. She doesn't have a lot that needs to be covered (picture Olive Oyl in a bikini) but after 2 or 3 summers in use, her suit was ready for retirement. Besides. It was a size 7/8. 7/8 like what first and second graders typically wear. It still fit her and she wasn't hanging out of it anywhere but we insisted.

Even though she is a teenager and going into 8th grade I knew that nothing that is supposed to fit her would fit her. I thought size 10/12 should work though. I went shopping one day and took pictures of different suits I thought were cute and sent them to Bugaboo's phone at home for Pootie to see and choose one. She chose a red and white striped two piece but when I went back for it, the ONE that was size 10/12 wasn't there anymore. Shitballs. I left without buying anything and figured she could go back some other time to see if they got more or go to a different store to look.

A couple days later Bugaboo took Pootie shopping. I knew it would be a painful experience because Pootie is very critical of everything that isn't just perfect and gets mean about it and I was glad to not have to go. They came back a couple hours later and Pootie triumphantly held up her purchase. She liked the color, the style and the fit. I was happy. She was happy. Bugaboo was happy to have made it home alive. All seemed well.

Until she tried it on for me. It still seemed quite small. She yelled, "Its a size 10/12 just like you said to get!!" I looked at the hanger. Yep. 10/12. I looked at the tags. Um. Not quite 10/12. It was size 6x. Like what kindergarteners wear.

She had already taken the tags off and that protective lining in the bottoms and argued that her old one just probably shrunk and this one will be fine. She'll NEVER put it in the dryer, she promised. OK. Whatever. As long as I don't have to take her shopping for another one. This one will probably last her until she can drive anyway and she can go by herself.